Husband’s regret following Bondi tragedy
ABACUS COLE
APRIL 30, 2024
A father of three and husband of one, Greg Burns, is feeling a deep sense of loss after the tragic stabbing of six that also left another 12 injured.
Greg's wife Lisa was shopping at Bondi Junction Westfield at the exact time that the stabbings took place, but was shopping one floor down picking up a coffee from Donut King after completing grocery shopping at Woolworths.
Greg is mourning the loss of the missed opportunity that is statistically unlikely to ever come his way again.
Greg regrets that his wife of 15 years was not one of the six victims killed by the stabber.
"Or she could have been lucky number seven" Greg says with tears in his eyes.
"Our marriage had been functionally over for at least three years. Dead bedroom, no exchanged words of affection or even affirmation. Frequent nagging. Then I would blow up over the smallest things because of the stress and dissatisfaction I was feeling toward Lisa."
"We were just trying to stay together for the kids. But even our eldest, who was entering into the puberty years, could see things between Mum and Dad just weren't right."
"My wife had planned to pick up some groceries from Woolies on that Monday afternoon. Being school holidays I had the week off work so I could have some quality time with the kids. Since I was the one home with them, dealing with the toddler and all their silly fighting, I asked Lisa to do me a favour and pick me up a coffee from the Luxe cafe.
Greg regrets that his wife of 15 years was not one of the six victims killed by the stabber.
"Or she could have been lucky number seven" Greg says with tears in his eyes.
"Our marriage had been functionally over for at least three years. Dead bedroom, no exchanged words of affection or even affirmation. Frequent nagging. Then I would blow up over the smallest things because of the stress and dissatisfaction I was feeling toward Lisa."
"We were just trying to stay together for the kids. But even our eldest, who was entering into the puberty years, could see things between Mum and Dad just weren't right."
"My wife had planned to pick up some groceries from Woolies on that Monday afternoon. Being school holidays I had the week off work so I could have some quality time with the kids. Since I was the one home with them, dealing with the toddler and all their silly fighting, I asked Lisa to do me a favour and pick me up a coffee from the Luxe cafe.
“They made the best coffees there. But instead she just did what was convenient for her. Which is what she always does... and she picks up a basic coffee from the Donut King, because it is right near the Woolies. She didn't feel like going up one flight of travelators with a trolley - far too much trouble to go to for the sake of her husband - and all coffee is basically the same, right? – No, wrong!”
“Well, had my wife done as I asked, and gone to Luxe cafe, she would have been there at the exact time Joel Cauchi was running around, threatening and stabbing nearby victims. The CCTV shows that people in the Luxe cafe and its vicinity felt threatened and were genuinely fearing for their lives.”
“To think that my wife was potentially so close to becoming the slaughtered seventh victim and that her simple act of marital unfaithfulness by not getting my coffee from where I wanted is what kept her alive… It just sickens me to my stomach.”
“Like every dissatisfied husband who ever lived, of course I have had the fantasy about killing my wife.”
“But of course, your mind goes through all the difficulties, the many ways you can get caught, the evidence you inevitably unintentionally leave behind - and the prospect of being the subject of a Netflix documentary in three years time. It just makes it untenable.”
“Well, had my wife done as I asked, and gone to Luxe cafe, she would have been there at the exact time Joel Cauchi was running around, threatening and stabbing nearby victims. The CCTV shows that people in the Luxe cafe and its vicinity felt threatened and were genuinely fearing for their lives.”
“To think that my wife was potentially so close to becoming the slaughtered seventh victim and that her simple act of marital unfaithfulness by not getting my coffee from where I wanted is what kept her alive… It just sickens me to my stomach.”
“Like every dissatisfied husband who ever lived, of course I have had the fantasy about killing my wife.”
“But of course, your mind goes through all the difficulties, the many ways you can get caught, the evidence you inevitably unintentionally leave behind - and the prospect of being the subject of a Netflix documentary in three years time. It just makes it untenable.”
“Then you fantasize about her dying in a car crash - on the way to work, of course, when she is by herself - not when the kids are in the car - and you imagine what it would be like to be the Dad with three kids who lost his wife - and what an attractive prospect you would become to women on the dating apps. People see you as a good Dad, stable job, safe prospect for an attractive divorcee or younger woman looking for a mature, responsible partner because all the younger millennials are selfish and reckless. I could start all over again, guilt-free and with no consequences.”
“And then this tragic event comes along - a crazed knife wielding incel - in a shopping centre, clearly targeting women. And my wife is there - right time, right place, and in what would have been the perfect vulnerable position. A heavy trolley full of groceries, a hot coffee in one hand, an easy target for even the most dim-witted knife wielder. And all because of her wilful, self-centred, ingrained desire to withhold even the simplest pleasures from her husband, Lisa was one floor below where I needed her to be. The universe had put all the pieces in place. My prospect of wife-free future was beckoning me. It was just up to Lisa play her part. And like the many victims living and dead stabbed by Cauchi, my potential future was cut to shreds when my wife was not, because of where she was not.”
When asked about what's next, Greg is philosophical and acknowledges he is unlikely to ever have this opportunity for a guilt-free exit from his marriage ever again.”
"You can book a trip to Bali, but you're not likely to get a bombing. You can book a cruise ship holiday, but icebergs are so easy to navigate these days, and flu viruses that kill the young and healthy are a once per century event - like Hayley's comet. And a comet hitting the earth? Sure, it almost happened twice in 1998, as detailed in the documentaries Deep Impact and Armageddon. But again, the chances of it wiping out my wife, while the kids and I survive? That’s minimal...”
“I have thought about replacing my wife's sunscreen with mayonnaise, but skin cancer is a speculative move and slow going in any case.”
“The way I see it is this: tragedies are happening all the time, all over the place. But they rarely manifest in the same way twice. For example, Bondi Westfield reopened with a higher security presence. But the way these things work, it is so unlikely that a perpetrator would choose to go to the exact same location to commit the same type of crime.”
“When Islamic terrorists committed their biggest attacks, they always changed it up, first in the USA it was flying aeroplanes into landmarks, then in London it was public transport, then USA again, a marathon race, then in France, an Eagles of Death Metal concert. You can't pick it!
“I think I have two options that statistically will get my wife into a situation where she is tragically killed and it was totally out of my control.”
“And then this tragic event comes along - a crazed knife wielding incel - in a shopping centre, clearly targeting women. And my wife is there - right time, right place, and in what would have been the perfect vulnerable position. A heavy trolley full of groceries, a hot coffee in one hand, an easy target for even the most dim-witted knife wielder. And all because of her wilful, self-centred, ingrained desire to withhold even the simplest pleasures from her husband, Lisa was one floor below where I needed her to be. The universe had put all the pieces in place. My prospect of wife-free future was beckoning me. It was just up to Lisa play her part. And like the many victims living and dead stabbed by Cauchi, my potential future was cut to shreds when my wife was not, because of where she was not.”
When asked about what's next, Greg is philosophical and acknowledges he is unlikely to ever have this opportunity for a guilt-free exit from his marriage ever again.”
"You can book a trip to Bali, but you're not likely to get a bombing. You can book a cruise ship holiday, but icebergs are so easy to navigate these days, and flu viruses that kill the young and healthy are a once per century event - like Hayley's comet. And a comet hitting the earth? Sure, it almost happened twice in 1998, as detailed in the documentaries Deep Impact and Armageddon. But again, the chances of it wiping out my wife, while the kids and I survive? That’s minimal...”
“I have thought about replacing my wife's sunscreen with mayonnaise, but skin cancer is a speculative move and slow going in any case.”
“The way I see it is this: tragedies are happening all the time, all over the place. But they rarely manifest in the same way twice. For example, Bondi Westfield reopened with a higher security presence. But the way these things work, it is so unlikely that a perpetrator would choose to go to the exact same location to commit the same type of crime.”
“When Islamic terrorists committed their biggest attacks, they always changed it up, first in the USA it was flying aeroplanes into landmarks, then in London it was public transport, then USA again, a marathon race, then in France, an Eagles of Death Metal concert. You can't pick it!
“I think I have two options that statistically will get my wife into a situation where she is tragically killed and it was totally out of my control.”
“First, I could encourage her to go back packing with some of her old uni friends. Surely, we are overdue for some Ivan Milat - Wolf Creek-style copycat action.”
“Second, we relocate to the USA, and I insist that my wife goes through public school again like Adam Sandler in that other 1990s documentary Billy Madison - it can't be too long before she ends up being the victim of a mass school shooting.”
“Second, we relocate to the USA, and I insist that my wife goes through public school again like Adam Sandler in that other 1990s documentary Billy Madison - it can't be too long before she ends up being the victim of a mass school shooting.”
